By Will Wheeler – Neurodivergent Mates Podcast

Introduction: From Struggle to Strategy

For many neurodivergent people, the path from childhood to career is far from straightforward. School often feels like a hostile environment, filled with labels like lazy, distracted, or not applying themselves. Yet beyond those early setbacks, countless individuals go on to build remarkable careers powered by the very traits that once held them back.

On the Neurodivergent Mates podcast, I sat down with Kerry Milne, an AuDHD (Autistic + ADHD) marketing strategist and founder of Gap, to unpack her story. Kerry’s honesty about school struggles, late diagnosis, and anxiety paints a powerful picture of resilience. Today, she draws on her neurodivergent strengths to help businesses across Australia and beyond create smarter strategies and stronger connections.

School Days: “Trying Harder” Was Never Enough

Kerry describes school as a place of constant anxiety. Diagnosed with dyslexia at 13 but left undiagnosed for ADHD and autism until decades later, she was labelled as a “good student” who simply needed to try harder.

She remembers:

• Struggling to read and retain information.
• Crying every morning before school from overwhelming anxiety.
• Tutors on weekends but still poor grades.
• Feeling like she was letting everyone down.

“Every report card said the same thing: Kerry needs to try harder. But I was already trying as hard as I could.” – Kerry

Like many neurodivergent girls in the 80s and 90s, her challenges went unseen. ADHD was considered a “boy’s condition,” leaving Kerry to mask her struggles with compliance and people-pleasing.

Finding Refuge in Sport

While the classroom was suffocating, sport became Kerry’s lifeline. She excelled in netball, volleyball, basketball, and swimming. Coaching younger kids gave her confidence and leadership skills that academics never did.

On the court, she wasn’t the “dumb kid.” She was skilled, intuitive, and respected. She could read micro body language and anticipate moves before they happened – strengths that later translated into her marketing career.

From Lowest Scores to University

Kerry eventually scraped into university with the lowest possible entry score in her state. She was embarrassed when classmates somehow discovered her ranking, but relieved to have “made it through.”

Yet those years reinforced the pattern: her academic results didn’t reflect her intelligence. She often felt misunderstood and unsupported, especially by teachers who preferred students who didn’t require extra effort.

The Power of a Late Diagnosis

Kerry wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD and autism until her late 40s. For her, it was both liberating and heartbreaking.

“It was like finally being handed the manual for my brain after decades of trying to use the wrong one.” – Kerry

The diagnosis reframed her past:

• She wasn’t dumb, lazy, or careless.
• Her struggles with tests, anxiety, and masking made sense.
• She could finally embrace her differences as strengths, not flaws.

There was grief, too – for the anxious child who cried daily, for wasted therapy sessions that never addressed the root cause, and for lost years spent trying to be someone else.

Coping Mechanisms: From Nightclubs to Networking

Kerry recalls using alcohol in her youth as a way to cope with overwhelming sensory environments. Nightclubs and pubs left her overstimulated, so she’d drink heavily just to feel “normal.”

Today, she avoids those environments altogether. She knows her limits and protects her energy. Networking events, for example, remain difficult:

• Sensory overload – the hum of lights, multiple conversations, the smell of carpets.
• Masking – playing the extrovert while feeling drained inside.
• Boundaries – saying no to environments that don’t work for her.

This self-awareness is one of her greatest shifts post-diagnosis.

How Neurodivergence Shapes Marketing Strategy

Kerry’s AuDHD traits have become assets in her marketing work:

• Pattern recognition – quickly spotting connections others miss.
• Hyperfocus – diving deep into data and insights.
• Problem-solving creativity – finding new ways to tackle challenges.
• Empathy – understanding the customer’s perspective with clarity.

She explains that for her, creativity isn’t about art. It’s about solving problems in ways others don’t think of.

Her ability to read people – honed from years of masking and mirroring – also made her a natural in sales. As a teenager, she sold shoes by truly listening to customers’ needs and offering tailored solutions. That same empathy drives her strategies today.

The Cost of Masking in Corporate Life

Kerry’s career included senior roles at GE, Vodafone, and other global companies. On the surface, she thrived. But behind the mask, the cost was high:

• Long hours spent catching up on work after overwhelming days of meetings.
• Constant fear of being “found out” as not smart enough.
• Burnout from masking and overcompensating.

Still, those years gave her invaluable skills – from building frameworks to managing large-scale marketing campaigns. Today, she applies those lessons to help startups and scaling businesses without the unnecessary bureaucracy.

Leadership Through Lived Experience

Kerry’s experiences of anxiety and setbacks have deeply shaped her leadership style. She leads with empathy, recognising when others are struggling instead of dismissing them.

“I can see when someone’s overwhelmed, because I’ve been there. Instead of saying ‘pick yourself up,’ I ask: how can I help?”

She now speaks openly about ADHD paralysis, rejection sensitivity, and anxiety. Every time she does, people reach out to thank her for sharing the “real stuff” they thought they were alone in experiencing.

Lessons for Aspiring Neurodivergent Entrepreneurs

Kerry offers clear advice for others who feel like they don’t fit into the traditional mould:

• You’re not broken. Struggling in school or corporate doesn’t mean you’re incapable.
• Find your tribe. Surround yourself with people who “get” you.
• Be authentic. The more you pretend to be someone else, the more you attract the wrong crowd.
• Notice what you love. Instead of chasing titles, follow the activities that give you energy – problem-solving, building, creating, helping.
• Back yourself. Trust your instincts. Your ability to read people and connect dots is powerful.

Conclusion: Back Yourself

Kerry’s journey from anxious schoolgirl to AuDHD marketing expert shows the incredible potential of neurodivergent minds when given the right context.

She left school thinking she was dumb, only to discover she was deeply capable. She masked her way through corporate life, then used those lessons to build a business on her own terms.

Her parting advice is simple but profound:

“Back yourself. Borrow someone else’s confidence if you need to until you find your own voice, but always back yourself.”

For every neurodivergent person who has felt out of place in school, corporate, or life: your path doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s. Like Kerry, you can lean into your strengths, redefine success, and carve out a space where you thrive.

Where to Find Kerry

Connect with her on LinkedIn or through her business, Gap Marketing.

Listen to the Full Conversation

Catch the full episode of Neurodivergent Mates with Kerry Milne, by clicking below: